An Ode to the First Year Med Student

To what do we owe

This wonderful way,

Sitting in lecture,

And dissecting all day?

Dodging the undergrads

On our way to the ‘brary,

Kyphosis sets in

From the bookbags we carry.

Dreaming of muscles,

And bonding with Netter,

Rohen’s not bad,

But Grant’s a bit better.

What free time we have

Is just used for eating.

And half of our lunches

Come free from a meeting.

Our social life’s shot.

Too caught up learning vessels,

But we somehow have time,

To follow Jim Tressel.

We’re living on loans.

Much debt, we’ll acquire.

And we hope to repay them.

Before we retire.

Everyone tells us

“One day, it’s worth it.”

And to this one mantra,

We are forced to submit.

It pulls us from bed

And drags us to class.

It opens our books,

And moves us to pass.

We’ll do what we do,

And continue this spree,

Until 4 years from now

When we get our degree.

We’ll look back on these days,

Reflect on our fate,

And take pride when we say,

“I survived Ohio State.”

Keeping up with the Jones'

Since Andrew has updated his blog, I've realized that it's probably time that I do the same... Although I'm not sure that I have much to write about of any significance, I can at least detail some of the happenings of the past few days that I've found mildly amusing or exciting and non-med-school related for the most part.

Yesterday, the roomies and I afforded ourselves a little study break in order to drool over the things we plan on doing in 2 weekends after our next test. These included apple picking (contrary to popular [Michigan] belief, Ohio does, in fact have orchards), and a shopping trip to Jeffersonville Outlets- about 55 minutes from Columbus. For those of you who don't know my shopping habits, I basically refuse to pay full price for anything (Yes, my mom taught me well), therefore, whenever someone makes a comment to me that starts with, "Oh, I like your [insert name of random article of clothing here]..." it usually is followed by me saying, "Thanks! I got it for 10 bucks at TJMaxx!" I am a firm believer in TJMaxx, as my roommates have come to discover, and I also love outlet shopping. So, since Kristine has an obsession with Coach purses which I share wholeheartedly, but without the necessity to pay full price for them, and Robin is also a fan of retail therapy, I decided it was high time I introduce the roomies to the wonders of outlet shopping and TJMaxx, since neither of them has ever dabbled in the art of bargain shopping.

Which brings me to my next point... Another thing on our prioritized to-do list, is going out to dinner on Friday to celebrate the end of our first med school exam ever. Hooray! Lucky for them, I have come across a late graduation present which will allow dinner to be on me at the Cheesecake Factory :) The only caveat here is that all roommates are required to dress up... in dresses... No dress, no dinner. This presents a problem for one roommate- let's call her "She-who-shall-not-be-named (SWSNBN)." Let me lay the foundation for this... SWSNBN absolutely loathes dressing up to the point that SWSNBN owns exactly one fancy dress that cannot be considered a sun dress. That one fancy dress was the dress that SWSNBN bought specifically for White Coat Ceremony because prior to that, she did not own any dresses that she deemed fit to wear. So yesterday, once I told the roommates what the stipulations of dinner on me were, we got into a big discussion about what everyone was going to wear. SWSNBN wanted to wear dress pants that "weren't business-y..." Right... I don't think so, not on my watch.

This opened up a new can of worms. We all browsed through SWSNBN's closet to see if she did, in fact, have nothing appropriate to wear. Upon discovering that she, in fact, really did only have one dress to choose from, we decided that she needed to try on some of my dresses (most of which were under 20 dollars and, of course, purchased at TJMaxx...) in order to prove to her that she doesn't look as stupid in a dress as she thinks. This led to me deciding that I should try on the sundress that she wore to graduation to see how ridiculous it would end up looking on me (FYI- red halter sundress that hits 3 inches above the knee + 4 inch patent leather peep toes= cross b/w transvestite and streetwalker... haha) After convincing her that my dresses would indeed fit her, contrary to her previous misconceptions, and finally getting her to try on 2 of my dresses, which both looked very nice on her, she put on a nice trapeze-cut dress of mine that looked absolutely gorgeous on her. Of course, her reaction was pure disgust- she hated how the dress looked on her and promptly took it off before we could convince her to let us see. Needless to say, she looked super-cute when we finally did get to see it on after much prodding for her to re-try it. That leaves us where we are now...

SWSNBN is actually a little bit excited to do some dress shopping so she can find a "dress that fits her and looks good on her" (as if we didn't already find one that did), and we're headed to TJMaxx tomorrow. Hopefully, something good will come out of this and we'll sniff out a good bargain in the process...

That's all for now... If you made it to the end, good for you ;)

If you're reading this, and you know who you are, I'm sure you're ready to kill me, buuuutttttt...

I can only hope that you realize that you are a beautiful girl inside and out, and if only you could take a step back and stop being so uber-critical of herself, you would see that you could pull off a lot more than you give yourself credit for. I think you might surprise yourself...

"No matter what our achievements might be, we think well of ourselves only in rare moments. We need people to bear witness against our inner judge, who keeps book on our shortcomings and transgressions. We need people to convince us that we are not as bad as we think we are."

P.S. In case you're wondering, if ever there was a time I was being sincere, without a hint of sarcasm, this is it... Take from it what you will...

Morning Rants

Since Kristine has been bugging me to write another post (so she can do something unproductive when she's supposed to be doing something productive), I am obliging by blogging during this morning's lecture. And since I seem to be pretty good at ranting, I'm going to continue the pattern and complain about textbooks. (My apologies for always complaining about something school-related, but you have to understand that my life at this moment IS school)... Let me preface this by saying I may just be a wee-bit biased because I hate textbooks in general. Unfortunately, I am forced for this first block of anatomy to use the recommended textbooks... which both happen to be written by the same person... and both are written terribly... fml it's gonna be a long quarter haha...

Anyway, my first gripe about these books (anatomy and embryology) is that there is no glossary. No glossary! Hello! How do you write a textbook with an (over)abundance of bolded words with no glossary?! Furthermore, if you have an overabundance of bolded words with no glossary, the least you could do is actually define the words that you are emphasizing. What a novel concept! Instead, when I'm "reading" either of these books, I'll often come across an entire paragraph with just bolded terms. How is that helpful? I wish I knew...

Throughout this quarter, it's become more and more apparent to me and everyone I've been studying with that I am NOT a picture-person. I would much prefer to close my eyes and have someone say something to me than look at it in a picture. However, sometimes when I'm reading these (very well-written and descriptive) textbooks, I'm forced to search for a picture. And when I say search, I mean search. For instance, a sentence could read... "The foot is attached to the leg at the ankle joint (See figure 4.13A.27-42, #2)"... Not only do I have an entire litany of letters and numbers to label the figure, but the figure to which I'm supposed to refer is 10 to 15 pages away from the page on which it's referenced. Oh how I love to flip back 20 pages to find a picture of something that is described crappily on the page I'm am reading. More often than not, the pictures aren't any more helpful... Awesome(ly amazing)...

One more rant to add... At least if you're going to write a textbook, make it somewhat readable. Not only do I have to deal with an entire paragraph of bolded terms, I also have to deal with a convoluted explanation, when there is actually an explanation present. A sentence may read something like this... "The tibia and the humerus are found in the leg and the arm respectively. The latter is attached to the shoulder and the former is attached to the hip. The tibia is the main bone of the leg. The humerus is the main bone of the arm. The tibia is supplied by the popliteal artery. The humerus is supplied by the brachial artery. The tibia is more superficial. The humerus is deeper. etc..." Why not just say the tibia is found in the superficial leg and is supplied by the popliteal artery. The humerus is found deep within the arm and is supplied by the brachial artery... Why do we have to flip flop back and forth? This is not very conducive to me making a simple outline... Jeez...

So, now that I've gotten that off my chest. If a representative for McGraw-Hill would like to contact me about free-lancing as an editor for their textbook division, I would be happy to entertain any and all offers...

That's all folks... Until next time...

No Rest for the Weary

Well it's about that time again... I'm in need of a study break, so here goes.

I think it's time for a little lesson in library etiquette. Now, I'm currently sitting in the aptly named "Grand Reading Room" in the main library on campus (Gorgeous- if you haven't checked it out, you should), and it's come to my attention in the past few weeks that there is a definite need for some tutorials in library etiquette on this campus. I feel that at this point, I am more than qualified to be addressing these issues, if for no other reason that my one source of entertainment between the hours of 8 and 5 most weekdays is the general migration from one library to another. I, therefore, have no qualms about pointing out some obvious infractions to the universally accepted code of etiquette.

1. Group study rooms are for, just that GROUP study. Now, I like studying within the confines of a room as opposed to out in the middle of the library where I will inevitably become distracted as much as the next person, but I will refrain from using any space labeled "group study" unless I have an entourage that consists of at least one other person. It doesn't make sense to take up an entire study room, often consisting of a 12-person conference table, if you are the only one in the room. Even if one's backpack, in itself, feels like carrying around another person, it in fact does not constitute another person, and therefore does not give you free reign to monopolize a group study room.

2. As I have already pointed out, the main library on campus is gorgeous, and often, a much nicer option than Prior. However, what gives with all the tour groups coming through here? It can be pretty distracting to hear people talking about the features of the "quiet" study room you are occupying, while you're trying your hardest to not be ADD for once and get something accomplished. I mean, what do you say on a tour like that? "And here are the sad, pathetic medical students still studying here on a Friday afternoon after everyone's already left for the weekend. We pity their poor souls..." With the tour groups, inevitably comes the annoying kids that for some reason people find it necessary to drag along with them to tour the library. Now, I don't know about you, but an 11-floor library full of books wasn't exactly my idea of fun when I was 5 years old. Nowhere in the name William Oxley Thompson Memorial Library is there mention of the words playground or daycare...

3. Perhaps the most important rule of library etiquette is the distance rule. It reads, "If one enters a space within a library where others are already positioned and studying, it is expected that he/she will claim a spot that is greater than or equal to at least one table's length away from said studiers in order not to disturb them and/or make them claustrophobic by your presence within their personal space bubble." Case and point- 2 days ago, 2 of us were studying together at a table in a library where we were, literally, the only ones in the entire library. Another student came up the stairs and proceeded to sit at the table directly next to us. Mind you, there were at least 50 other tables on that floor. And the icing on the cake is that she sat at the chair that put here closest to our table- about an arms length away from us. What nerve! We must just be that cool that people want to sit so close to us.

4. Lastly, just because you work in the library, you are not immune to the code of etiquette. Yesterday, in the main library, we were studying on the 4th floor, and for a solid 40 minutes, we had to put up with the obnoxiously whiny and extremely loud voice of a woman that carried all the way up from the ground floor. 1 by 1, the people sitting near us in the library started to put on headphones, but unfortunately, that did not really help the fact that we could still hear her entire conversation. I could've sworn she was screaming. Come to find out, she is actually the girl that works at one of the information desks! Some brave soul finally approached her, and the quiet was restored to the library after she realized that we had been unwillingly eavesdropping on her entire conversation for the past 40 minutes.

That about covers it...

I can't believe I just typed 5 paragraphs ranting about the use of libraries. My life is truly complete now...

Thanks for reading...